When stressed or overwhelmed I seek the things that provide familiarity. Traditions that stir warm childhood memories.
My dad's cooking.
A secret spot to clear your mind. (Yuba River, Nevada City, CA)
What provides me the most comfort are the small traditions gathered throughout my whole life. Most of these traditions were not planned or marked on the calendar.
As a child art supplies were always available. After a particularly bad day at school I would hole up in my room and spill the bottled up contents of my day onto the paper. As an adult many of the same supplies–pencils, pens, and paint–are still close at hand. About once a month I return to this escape and shut off communication to the world for an “art evening.”
Music. Pencils. Paper.
I recently spent a Saturday afternoon at Pompano Beach with my sister and her boys. As we walked along the shore we reminisced about our trips to the same beach when we were young. Nearly every Sunday for over 10 years we would wake up, pack the cooler, and head to Lighthouse Point or Pompano Beach. We recalled our Sunday trips to the beach as perhaps the most stress-free moments of our entire childhood. Shell hunting, castle building, and chasing gulls are a few of my most cherished traditions.
Nephew's muddy bucket.
Sister's shells.
Treasure found. (Visby, Sweden)
Some traditions are just as good alone.
A favorite meal at a favorite restaurant.
With others it’s best to have friend or family along.
Getting lost in a foreign bus station.
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As each family grows it is impossible to say which traditions will influence a life the most. Moments fall away from memory leaving the dependable experiences which always seem to be skirting the horizon, like a song sung each morning upon awaking, or Tom Brokaw’s voice introducing the evening news.
I can’t remember all the family vacations I took, and there’s a few I would rather not remember. Yet some memories–the smell of Saturday morning blueberry pancakes, playing in the woods with my sisters, and cracking peanuts with my mom in the bleachers at a Marlin’s game–are forever in the forefront of my heart.
With so much unknown surrounding the lasting impressions on young children’s lives, the best we can strive for is to be dependable in love, kindness, and honesty. If we meet these standards in the repetitive cycles of our years, even the smallest moments are sure to bear wonderful traditions.
© Jonathan Iris-Wilbanks and Sunflower Creative Arts, 2012
Photos © Jonathan Iris-Wilbanks, Joy Iris-Wilbanks and Sunflower Creative Arts, 2012
How lovely. As the mom of two grown “kids” – 27 and 30s, I still hear about their particular favorite smells and sounds and how much these sensory flashbacks mean to them. Lovely memories of their childhood days. (Particular burning leaves right after jumping into a big pile. Can’t do that anymore 😉 Thanks, Jonathan
I love this! It is so true… And as exciting as established traditions can be, it can be just as exciting to start new ones. 🙂
Best,
Jen Brown
I love the term ‘sensory flashbacks’ you use, how right on! Thank you so much for the comment Karyn.
I especially the new ones created between new and old friends! I find they help the friendships stay meaningful over distance and time.
Thanks for commenting Jen, and keep the beats flowing over on http://Stellarsounds.wordpress.com !!
🙂
Nice post Jonathan! Love your favorite traditions- especially the art making. As a mother, you really never know which memories will stick. Last night I was talking to my son, Steven. Cars,old and new were the topic. There was one time when one of those old cars broke down and I had to rent a car for a few days. Somehow we ended up with a fancy Mitsubishi Gallant! One of his fondest childhood memories is the night the three of us jumped into that plush car and drove north on A1A just for fun. A joy ride as the sea breeze floated around us, the stars twinkled and I seem to remember singing Billy Joel tunes….